The last couple of weeks I have been catching up with old friends. I actually made the effort, dug out email addresses and actual geographical addresses and wrote to people. Like an (insane) stalker I found people on Facebook and the majority of the time I have had a great chat with those I contacted.
You see I have spent quite a lot of time moaning that people don’t stay in touch but then it occurred to me, actually, I’m the one who doesn’t write to them or get in touch. So with zero expectations (hard with my OCD) I wrote to them and was pleasantly surprised, not only because some responded but mainly because I was ok with them even if they didn’t respond. I didn’t and still don’t view those who haven’t responded in a bad light because I had the choice to get in touch and they have a choice not to respond without me reading anything into it.
It’s ok for people not to stay in touch with me because I’m ok not staying in touch with various people from my past. Everyone is different. For me it’s been a great 2 weeks of being sociable and nostalgic, but it’s been a good week of taming the OCD dragon too. I conquered a fear and didn’t give in to the judgemental voice in my head. I changed a deeply rooted irrational belief. This makes me feel good even though as I type this I have Ménière’s disease. I’m hoping the prochlorperazine appears soon and I can actually get up and get weighed in at least tomorrow at our Slimming World meeting. I think I’ve definitely lost weight this week.
It was interesting to find out how many people I got on with in the past also have OCD! It seems we gravitated towards each other because we reinforced each other’s beliefs and pre-occupations. It was amusing to see what is seen as part of my OCD now was just the given norm in my past. This is definitely something I need to bring up in future group sessions.